Summer Bounty

Baby's first Farmers Market! Gotta start her out right. 

This summer we got to participate in the WIC Farmers Market Nutrition Program. "The FMNP was established by Congress in 1992, to provide fresh, unprepared, locally grown fruits and vegetables to WIC participants, and to expand the awareness, use of, and sales at farmers’ markets." As if we really needed any more motivation to get to the market, but how great is it that one of our nation's public health programs are supporting local and organic foods?!?!

Our loot from the Saint Paul Farmers' Market: 

Green bell peppers

Zucchinis

Onions

Tomatoes

Yukon gold potatoes

Early Season Apples! 

All for under $20! I love August for thus very reason. 

My summer favorite, a Caprese salad.

That's the only one I managed to take pictures of... most of the time I'm just lucky if I get to eat in one sitting. But here's some links to meals we've made recently using the bounty of the summer: 

garden pesto pasta 

easy quiche 

Though we used different ingredients this time: onions, zucchini, bell peppers, bacon and mozzarella! This meal is a great "garbage" dish because you can toss in whatever veggies you have leftover or whatever you have on hand. Mix up the cheeses, go sans meat, whatever you desire. 

potato/zucchini pancakes

zucchini bread muffins

Next week Jenna is going to teach us how to can tomatoes!!! Linnea and I can't wait! 

The First Six Weeks

Rod Radtke Photo 

I cannot believe that Linnea is nearly 7 weeks old already! What a crazy, exhausting, heart-wrenching and heart-warming adventure it has been so far! I say heart-wrenching because it breaks our hearts to see her cry, but every happy little smile and coo just warms our hearts right back up! This picture just melts my heart... grandpa does such good work. We had a blast taking her 1-month photos, and I am looking forward to our photo shoots every month!

Rod Radtke Photo

Now that we are on this side of the first 6 weeks I feel great. My body is mostly healed, I only have 5 more pounds to lose and most of my clothes fit, and breastfeeding is finally easy as pie. Well, except for the part where I tend to overproduce and Linnea has to try to drink from a fire hose. #goodproblemtohave

This is seriously what happens... source

Linnea is a pretty happy baby, doesn't cry too much and she is easy to soothe when she does. Most of the time. She's even cute when she cries! She wails the hardest when she is overtired, which is great actually because the harder she cries before we get her to sleep the harder she sleeps. She's gaining weight nicely, doesn't spit up too often, and I am constantly amazed at how her breastmilk poos don't stink! She's even started smiling for us, and she rolled over from her tummy to her back twice so far. The little things in life!

Rod Radtke Photo

In the first couple weeks I remember thinking that I was never going to be able to get dressed again, let alone go out and about. A few days postpartum I remember my father-in-law commenting "wow you got dressed!" (For the record, I had been mostly just wearing a robe, not nothing at all.) I still can't believe we came home from the birth center a mere 4 hours after she was born! I definitely felt weak but it sure did feel good to be in our own bed, the three of us all snuggled up together. A hospital surely wouldn't have allowed for such snuggling on that single bed.

How things have changed! We are definitely figuring out our rhythm as a family, though Ross says that Linnea really is the one that runs this family. We function on her time, sleep on her time, etc. But she's so worth it! I'm feeling so much more confident as a mother, and Linnea and I can even nurse and walk at the same time!

Proud Papa

We have also been extremely blessed in these first few weeks, not only by our beautiful, babbling baby girl, but by the love and support from our family. And we loved all our visitors.

Ross' mom spent the first two days home with us and she took care of everything. She was our postpartum nurse essentially (since we didn't have those two days in the hospital) - and I don't know what we would have done without her. She made sure we ate, slept, bathed, and of course that Linnea got lots of cuddle time. She also went grocery shopping for us since we had been planning on going that Friday, but someone made her debut on Wednesday.

Linnea and Grandma

My Grandma Caryl was in town for a wedding and stopped by to meet Linnea when she was 12 hours old!

Great Grandma

Then my Dad and Grandma flew out for a couple days and made sure we were showered with love (and fed as well.) Seriously, making sure we ate meals was the toughest things in those first couple weeks (and still is sometimes!) My Dad was even kind enough to sweep our floors!

Proud new first time Grandpa! 

Four Generations! Great grandma Barb, Grandpa Don, Jenn & Ross and Linnea 

Ross' Cousins Blake and Jenna came over one night and make us pizza from scratch! Blake's bread making skills definitely rival mine. ;)

Blake

Jenna

My Grandparents, sister and Niece came out for 4 days to visit as well! We had lots of fun realizing how not toddler-proof our home is (it's ok, we have time) and we took Linnea on her first outing to the Sea Life Aquarium at the Mall of America. My grandparents also made me my favorite meal of theirs - spaghetti with Italian sausage. Once again, love the meals!

Marissa, Grandma, Me, Renee, Papa and Linnea

Linnea's first ferris wheel

Then my dear friend Krystal came out from Omaha, though she just returned from a year long masters program in Hungary. We hadn't seen each other since my wedding! It was wonderful to have her around, AND she helped us out so much. We hadn't cleaned our house since before Linnea was born (over a month at this point) and Krystal did it all, made us food, and just helped us catch up on all those silly little chores that pile up. I feel so much more relaxed and on top of things now that I don't feel so far behind! We also had a lot of fun, going on walks to Minehaha Falls, napping, and visiting the Como Zoo!

Someone got hungry at the zoo! 

We are blessed beyond measure, and looking forward to sharing our lives with our beautiful little girl.

Rod Radtke Photo 

Adventures in Breastfeeding

In honor of World Breastfeeding Week 2012 - here's my story. 

source

And what an adventure it has been! Breastfeeding has been the most physically, mentally and emotionally challenging thing I've ever done. Yes, I had a natural unmedicated childbirth, but this has taken far more endurance, support and encouragement than I could have even imagined. I was very confident going into labor, I trusted my body and knew that it was meant to do this and that biology wouldn't fail me. Breastfeeding, I thought, would have been the same. I was perhaps even a bit idealistic about how it would go, I mean - my birth had been a dream, but it sure was quite a slap in the face with how much I struggled.

First off, even though she was only a week and a half early, pre-term babies have a tougher time sucking. We had latch issues from the get go, she was very lethargic, and within 24 hours my nipples had tiny blood blisters on them and I was so sore when she would wake up to eat I would just start crying. Everyone offered their advice to tell me how painful contractions were, therefore I could mentally prepare for it, but no one told me how painful breastfeeding is if you don't do it right (although I really appreciate my sister stocking me up on nipple cream and a friend reminding me to have it handy.)

Breastfeeding is a 4, perhaps 5 handed task at the beginning. I wouldn't be nursing today if I didn't have Ross by my side holding my boob, adjusting the seven or so pillows, holding her arm as she squirmed and fussed, creating the super baby swaddle (where you swaddle just the arms to allow for continued skin-to-skin contact). He was unwavering in his love and support and was always cheering us girls on. A bit of criticism I got in deciding to breastfeed was that Ross would never be able to feed her (which sharing feedings is really no reason to decide not to breastfeed... you'll probably have to pump and use bottles at some point) - but PLEASE, he was there every feeding making it happen. Emotionally he was my rock, and enabled me to continue to give our daughter an incredible gift of health.

At our 24 hour homevisit with our midwives I got lots of help and coaching and was reminded that we both just have to learn how to do this - and the learning curve is huge. Other than the occasional mother at work and my cousin when I visited her for a weekend, I'd never really seen women breastfeeding. I'd read a book and watched a few videos, but it didn't quite click. At 36 hours I was crying to Ross and while I knew I couldn't give up I knew why so few women actually breastfeed their children - there are so many barriers! Short, often unpaid maternity leave, lack of experience and support, formula companies advertising about how great their overpriced-infant-digestive-and-immune-system-havoc-wreaker concoctions are. I get why so many women give up: it's hard, not instinctive, and society doesn't make it any easier on us.

But I decided that it was important enough to me to persevere, and I was determined to make this work, so we pushed on. We ended up using a nipple shield. It makes it easier for baby to suck and get milk, and protects your nipples. I thought of it like wearing wool-skin in your hiking books to prevent blisters, thought it's temporary, once you form those callouses then you are fine. And it definitely helped, allowed me to nurse my baby pain free after a couple days, she could get all the milk she needed, and we were off and running.

Except that I hated it - it had a bit of a reservoir and milk would leak everywhere (especially when she would bat it off) and it was one more thing to clean, to pack, to make sure we ALWAYS had with us. And I felt hurt by it - that my own breasts and nipples weren't good enough for her. So after our three week appointment my midwife suggested going cold turkey, and that it would be like starting over (it was, and I didn't like it) but that I would be so much happier in the end (I am!).

The whole process was depressing to me - she outright rejected my nipple at first and I felt terrible, like I wasn't good enough, and that I was just a failure. I spent an entire 3 or 4 days where I decided I wasn't going anywhere, doing anything or letting anyone visit until we figured this out. She and I just hung out in bed, didn't get dressed or anything, and just worked on breastfeeding. Sometimes it would take an hour of fussing and crying until she would take the nipple, but then it was 45 minutes, then 30, then she finally realized that I had what she wanted and this was the only way she was going to get it. And boy did I feel like a champ once we got it! Of course my nipples were super sore for about another week and a half, but now they've toughened up and she's a nursing pro. It feels SO good - and I'm finally comfortable heading out into the world with my little one.

Now I LOVE breastfeeding, and am actually enjoying it and all the benefits! We have milk for her ready to go at any moment, at the right temperature, and we don't have to do any extra dishes. I don't even have to get out of bed at night for nighttime feedings, I can just roll her into my side, nurse, and we fall back asleep together. We get so much more sleep!!! I can even walk and nurse at the same time. I'm only 4 pounds from my pre-pregnancy weight and fitting into nearly my entire wardrobe and I've been eating whatever I want (my midwife told us that we need 500-800 extra calories everyday while nursing... I'm going to enjoy it!). I'm giving my baby incredible health benefits, aiding in the development of her immune system, and growing her myself. Oh - and it's all FREE.

As I'm reflecting on it now that we've almost made it to the 6-week mark and things are going well I want to share my words of wisdom:

DON'T GIVE UP - especially on a bad day; it gets better.
BUY - Nipple cream and soothing gel pads.
GET SUPPORT - having our midwives on call 24/7 made it possible, a lactation appointment, talking with a La Leche League leader, friends and family offering their love and prayers, and an incredible husband/partner to help you through those tough times. Don't wait to ask for help.
ATTEND - a La Leche League meeting while pregnant or after and watch other women breastfeed. It's not creepy, trust me, and the mother-to-mother support is incredible.
READ - as much as you can beforehand when you have more time. Get The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding and keep it by your side.
LOVE - the beautiful bond that you have with your little one. I love that I'm the only one who can nurse her, it means I get dedicated time with her that no one else can take away from me.

I know that for some there are significant medical barriers to breastfeeding, but I really believe every woman is capable just as our ancestors have been for millennia, and I just hope my story offers a bit of hope and support out there for you if you are trying to make it work. You can do it! Your body was made to produce milk!

Breast milk is the best milk!